Okay, Thomas has had a good run and by all accounts, still has a decent career. I’m sure he’ll step out again somewhere when we aren’t expecting him. However (there’s always a however on this blog), three things truly sucked about his career. One is Miami Vice; the other is his, ah, recording career, and finally his foray into the Psychic Readers’ Network. Here’s why:
Miami Vice – Don Johnson’s side order of Ricardo Tubbs. Let’s face facts: no one was into this dude on Vice. Women didn’t watch it to see Tubbs looking tubby. Women liked Johnson. Heck, he even started a coast to coast fashion trend among men with the sneakers, light cotton suits and rolled-up sleeves (tee-hee). Well, it was the 80’s. We learn a lot in retro(pun)spect. People remember Thomas of course however it’s always with a mix of pity and a yawn. Vice just wasn’t his long-suit (another pun). He acted well. He just didn’t rate. I read an article once (not a blog – this was the early 90’s) by a reporter who stated when she went to interview Thomas he was all over her, showing off this and that about his acting and treating her a foot massage and tea and scones, and what have you. Later at some sort of celeb party he acted like he didn’t know her. She stated how odd that was but perhaps that was how some celebrities acted. Frankly I can’t help but think Thomas was so sick of being in Johnson’s shadow that he went all out when a reporter came to see him so he’d get a terrific write-up. After that, show’s over folks!
The Psychic Readers’ Network: Really? Seriously? Was Thomas that low on funds? What did he do with the money he made on Vice? Spend it all on the Don Johnson look? I mean who the hell becomes a spokesperson for something that utterly phony and fraudulent? Seriously, that network (now known as Traffix Inc) rips so many people out of their hard-earned money it’s vile. There’s a special spot in hell for those fakes, put money on it (oops – maybe not). It’s a known fact that people who work for “psychic” phone lines are given a script to use when people call in for advice. They receive hours of training to know how to respond to, um, awkward questions. I can’t believe Network didn’t kill Thomas’ acting career. Then again, that’s probably the best acting he ever did in his life.
Recording Career: In 1985, Thomas recorded a music album titled Living the Book of My Life. Personally I like reggae and he has a good voice however (there’s always a however in this blog) it sold poorly and failed to produce a hit single. That tune really is bad. Besides we know Johnson released a song or two before Thomas (Heartbeat). it was lousy, too…very…80s American like something you’d see in a really bad teenage movie. Anyway. This isn’t about Johnson….yet. Could Thomas’ brief recording career be a coincidence, an influence, or just an embarrassment (maybe all three)? Perhaps he should have recorded Reading the Palm of Your Hand. Thomas followed up in 1988 with a second album, Somebody. It also failed to produce a hit and sold poorly. As a matter of fact his current net worth is $2.7 million. Compare that with $1 billion for Justin Bieber, $25 million for Michael Jackson and $30 million for, you guessed it, Don Johnson. Is this bad investing or a lackluster career?
Last off he did a voice-over in the video game Grand Theft Auto: Vice City (another cazy coincidence). He’s much more handsome now than he ever was as a young man, no question. The wisdom of his years have given him an attractive distinction, well, from what I know of his career. His personal life could be another matter entirely…