Brooke Shields – Pretty Old, Baby

Celeb:  Brooke Shields
Occupation: TV and Film Actress

Brooke Shields was the most controversial  (slutty) actress/model of the late 1970s to early 1980s. The weird thing about her was she starred in sleazy roles, did sleazy commercials then promoted virginity to young girls in America. Great role model. Brooke began her modelling career when she was 11 months old. She was featured as the blonde-haired Gerber Baby on cereal boxes. Her next job was the Ivory Soap girl, then she signed on with Eileen FordBrooke’s trademark beauty features were her lustrous, brown hair and thick brown eyebrows. Undeniably beautiful in her teen years, in 1979, at 14, she became the youngest ever Vogue cover model. She also starred in a series of provocative Calvin Klein jeans commercials that caused a big ballyhoo.  Brooke was never at her finest than when she was a sleaze. By 16, Brooke’s daily modelling rate was $10,000.00. To watch Brook Shields Calvin Commercials click here.

At 11, Brooke made a brief cameo as a murder victim in the horror film, Alice, Sweet Alice, in 1976. In 1978 Brooke starred in Pretty Baby as Violet, a prostitute’s daughter who lives in a whorehouse. She was Wanda Nevada in the film of the same name, then brooke shields makeupat 14, appeared in the box office hit The Blue Lagoon. The following year Brooke made another hit in Endless Love, which sucked but kids liked it. That’s where Brooke’s career did a 180. You know all the aforementioned sleazy, controversial roles? Poof! Gone up in smoke. Brooke’s PR machine worked hard to clean up her image into All-American Wholesome. It worked. Go figure. To see Brooke in Pretty Baby click here. To watch Sticky Kiss – The Blue Lagoon
To watch Alice, Sweet Alice click here.
To see Wanda Nevada click here.

At 17 Brooke won the Worst Actor Razzie Award for her role in Sahara. Ouch. Several more feature films followed including The Muppets Take Manhattan, Brenda Starr, and a string of totally banal films you’ve never heard of, such as The 7th Floor, Backstreet Dreams, The Postgraduate, Freaked, The Misadventures of Margaret, The Weekend, Just You and Me Kid, and Black and White. I told you you’ve never heard of them. Even Brooke forgot she made them (or wishes). to watch Brooke Shields in Brenda Starr click here.

All the while busy Brooke made appearances in TV sitcoms and films including Wet Gold, Quantum Leap, I Can Make You Love Me (wasn’t that Pretty Baby?), Tales From the Crypt, Nothing Lasts Forever, Friends and in 1996, Suddenly Susan, a typical, witless American sitcom that lasted a surprising 4 years. Brooke didn’t stop working. Throughout the late 1990s to 2010 Brooke starred in tv movies and shows such as Just Shoot Me (okay), That 70s Show, Nip & Tuck (you don’t say), Two and a Half Men (lucky Brooke, working with Charlie Sheen. See my blog Charlie Sheen – Actor and Wizard), Hannah Montana, and Lipstick Jungle. I had no idea. I figured Brooke was just the Colgate Queen. Or was it Crest? Whatever. Hence the reason the Pretty Baby is a wash up. To see Brooke Shields in Tales From the Crypt Came the Dawn click here. That’s where it gets tawdry.

At 22 and single, Brooke claimed she lost her virginity because she didn’t have a “good self-image.” Wrong. It was because she lived the first 16 years of her life as a tart. Bound to happen. Ouch. (Check the pic on the left…she was 16!) Brooke was romantically linked to Liam Neeson, Dean Cain, John F Kennedy Jr, John Travolta and George Michael (well we know he wasn’t the guilty party). Michael Jackson claimed they dated (Michael didn’t steal Brooke’s virginity…she tried to steal his). To see Michael Jackson Memorial Service – Brooke Shields click here.

Brobrookeoke married twice: the first time to pompous tennis player Andre Agassi, the second time to some nobody named Chris Henchi. She has two kids but you’d never know it (she leaves them with nannies). In the spring of 2005, Brooke appeared on The Oprah Winfrey Show and discussed her severe postpartum depression (that sucks). She experienced depression, thoughts of suicide, an inability to respond to her baby and delayed maternal bonding. The illness may have been triggered by a traumatic childbirth, her father death, stress from in vitro fertilization and a family history of depression. Yep, that oughta do it. Plus her mother was a drunk. Did you know that? Yep. Bad enough Ol’ Terry Shields was a stage mother, she was the worst kind of alkie. To watch Brooke Shields on Oprah click here. And on the left is a “gorgeous photo” of Brooke today. At least when she was young she had beauty going for her.

Redemption
As if. Every film she has made since 1980 sucked. And the one she made in 1980 sucked.
Comeback
Toothpaste.
Comeback Grade: S for Sleazy at 12 means washed up at 20.
Brooke’s Facebook Fans: 17,361 – In the ballpark

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25 Responses to Brooke Shields – Pretty Old, Baby

  1. Loren H, Vasquez says:

    she is the best,this world has ever seen, i have a lot of respect for her.

  2. brookefan says:

    She was the most beautiful woman in the world, before puberty hit. Now she’s just gorgeous. But after puberty, it’s downhill for all women. A 25 year old cannot compete with a 14 year old. But twenty, thirty, forty somethings can still look good. But more than that, she’s classy, respectful, educated, and a great person. Lover her.

  3. Anonymous says:

    you are a douche bag

  4. TGD says:

    You truly are an idio;t and a pathetic reporter of TRUTH OR FACTS.

    Brooke is NOT a 14 yrs old girl posing on that issue of PLAYBOY you depict in this page.

    This extremely lame page devoted to super vicious coverage of her personally, and her film and modeling career.

    Your text states she is 14 years old on this magazine cover- you should be mortified.

    The magazine cover clearly makes an ass out of you. It gives the year away: 1986! NOW GO DO THE MATH. DO YOU REALIZE SHE IS AN ADULT IN THAT PHOTO?

    You must be a true loser yourself, since all you can write about are people who are mere humans- who happened to find celebrity at some point in their life- that had problems.

    All sorts of problems and problems in varying degrees. Oh my- how shocking.

    Gee, like regular people everywhere don’t have problems of all kinds?

    Who said celebrities are required to be role models?

    I guess that was in some rule book somewhere – and you failed to mention it.

    I did not know that mental illness and addictions were something to make fun of-or-mock.

    You must be one super perfect person- right? ( Said with great sarcasm).

    Clearly, you don’t understand there is a connection between addictions and mental illness and because of such, many people self medicate.

    Why don’t you try getting educated on the topics you make a joke of, in addition to getting the facts straight on the celebrities you cover?

    All in all? Your entire blog is written in a very cruel and mean spirited tone, peppered with way too many inaccuracies..

    You don’t have to like the people you write about, but you take it a step further: you hate everyone you write about and can’t possibly say enough bad things about them.

    Oh yeah- bad things and totally inaccurate things.

    I think the misunderstanding here is that out of all the people covered in this blog- it is YOU, who is the biggest loser.

    • Anonymous says:

      hmm.. & u should find somthin better 2 do.. seems u got lo-o-o-ots of time on ur handys.. this is funny as hell.. & if not all true, im %200 sure very close.. nice lookin galls like Brookee here dont make a carrier without havin som private moments with.. lets say Charlie Sheen (good 4 him).. or som old Director.. lets say like Miss Kristen Stewart & Rupert Sanders (who’s almost double her age.. good 4 him). So, u protectin som beutiful (long ago) face, who ud probably wish (after watchin 1 of those movies) would b ur lil sis or somthin.. :-D ..well, all ah can say is: “If u cant take-in criticism, dont go in2 ShowBizzzzz..”

  5. lifeisbeautiful says:

    Who is this piece of Sh#$@t with this blog? You press “Home” and nothing about the blogger. You press “About”… nothing about this douche. Where is the “Profile” button? Should anyone trust a blog in which NO info is available about the host?… Tremendously sinister and tastless. This moron does NOT have the nerve to be identified, except for the “posted by teacher” (?) SO this er… person (?) is a teacher?!!!… O M Gawd… I feel sorry for whom-EVER is taught by this creep! I think I read somewhere here on this Brooke page a remark about Charlie Sheen, and this weirdo is actually praising him! WOW! Notice how convoluted this er… person´s (?) views are… Brooke (talented happily married mother of two, with a huge list of accomplishments as actor, model AND writer) is a loser, whilst Charlie (fuck up womanizer substance abuser, herpies ridden mofo who self destroys whilst ruining own carrier in a flash) is supposed to be some kind of “special”…….. This is so pathetic I might come back here to read on other misrepresented celebrities later. Hmmmmm…. come to think of it; would be a great waste of my virtual time. This half-arse blog should be ignored to death…and complete oblivion folks! BTW ran into it by total accident AND unwillingly… *sigh*! I think I read somewhere here on this Brooke page a remark about Charlie Sheen, and this weirdo is actually praising him! WOW! Notice how convoluted this er… person´s (?) views are… Brooke (talented happily married mother of two, with a huge list of accomplishments as actor, model AND writer) is a loser, whilst Charlie (fuck up womanizer substance abuser, herpies ridden mofo who self destroys whilst ruining own carrier in a flash) is supposed to be some kind of “special”…….. This is so pathetic I might come back here to read on other misrepresented celebrities later. Hmmmmm…. come to think of it; would be a great waste of my virtual time. This half-arse blog should be ignored to death…and complete oblivion folks! BTW ran into it by total accident AND unwillingly… *sigh*

    • Anonymous says:

      all I see in this post is…… BLAH BLAH BLAHHHH.. BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH… & then som mor BLAH BLAH BLAH.. & if that wouldn’t be enough, it has bin repeated twice..!!! OMG indeed..

    • Anonymous says:

      we’ll be seeing you again….

  6. lifeisbeautiful says:

    One more thing before I leave this crap to the dust: people like this er… blogger (?) are the kind who make the weird-wide-web… so not trust-worthy…

    • Anonymous says:

      WHen did anyone tell you the web is trust-worthy? Opinions have nothing to do with trust or not….she’s simply pathetic.

  7. Anonymous says:

    Oh really? You suck. How crude, mean, and immature you are (not to mention a liar). Brooke Shields is an amazing, exemplary woman. If you look at interviews, when she was a child, you clearly sensed she was different in a special way. She has always been a sweet, well-adjusted, down-to-earth, kind and intelligent person. Not to mention gorgeous and talented. Something about Brooke just screams GENUINE. I “grew up” with Brooke via movies, TV, and magazines. I have always loved and admired her, so YES, I take offense. And yes, you still suck. I lowered myself to your level. Oh yeah, did I mention you suck?
    Get your facts straight bubba. I hope you find happiness somehow.

    • Anonymous says:

      Yes she was special in a different way….a sex symbol at 7 years old, playing a child bride of a pedophile when she was 12 years old, answering in court for her appearances in Calvin Klein ads….right you are about special.

  8. Anonymous says:

    So Brookes career has been lack lustre huh?Yeh your right.That would explain the fact that she has not been out of work her WHOLE life.Or that she has one several people’s choice awards…or been nominated for an Emmy…..Twice!!!! Or that by the mid nineties she was the fourth most photographed woman in the world.. (after princess Diana,Liz Taylor and Madonna )or that Time magazine praised her as the face of the eighties…or that Calvin Klein stated that she was THE most beautiful woman he had ever seen…or that even now she is praised for her work on broadway(Addams family,wonderfultown,Grease)or that she has done 5 movies in the last 2 years with more on the horizon……WHAT A SLACKER!!!
    People obviously still adore her 30 years after she became a bonafide superstar….so suck it knob jockey!!!!!
    Brooke…you rock.!

  9. aj says:

    whats her age now?

  10. Anonymous says:

    Born: May 31, 1965 (age 47)

  11. Anonymous says:

    Wow. Full of hate and envy article. Never coming back to this website.

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